Between all the self-hate and self-pity, there’s a hallelujah. I can't tell you where to find your hallelujah or how you’ll get there. But I can tell you that the voice of guidance you’re looking for isn’t rushed or forced; it’s soft. It’s patience.
I've learned that when I bring my attention back to myself, when I don’t blame the world and take responsibility for my 50% of any relationship, I can move through life a lot more lightly. There's not as much mud to clean off my boots. Part of that is not focusing on what others are doing, but on what my body is telling me.
There’s no such thing as the right answer; you will make mistakes. But if you’re anything like me, you don’t think things happen by mistake. If we pay close attention, we start to really see where the pain is and begin to realize where the work starts.
When that voice comes, it will point you in the right direction. DONT BETRAY IT
Song, I am unused to you— when you come
your voice is behind trees calling another by my name.
So little of me moves out to you that I cannot hold your weight.
I bury you in sleep or pour more wine, or lost in another's music I forget that you ever spoke.
If you come again, come with Elias! Elias! Elias!
if only once the summons were a roar, a pillar of light, I wouldn't betray you.
A poem, by Jim Harrison
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